Do You Practice on a River or a Lake?
A group of people stood at a scenic lookout. They peered down through the trees at a long stretch of the Shenandoah river and one of them said, “This would be a fantastic place for crew practice. It’s great because you’d get a chance to really work on something without having to stop and turn around.”
The Illusion of Mastery
It is easy to imagine mastery as the end of the road. A master has arrived—he has become the best he could possibly be. MLB pitcher R.A. Dickey offers a different take on mastery. (You can hear the full interview on which this article is based here.) During the first peak in his career, R.A. Dickey succeeded as a closer throwing a fastball. But as he aged his speed began to decline. He could have quit, but instead he reinvented himself as a knuckleball pitcher.
Five Questions That Shape Our Lives
Our futures are shaped by the questions we ask regularly. This is the topic of Jason Jaggard’s inspiring talk, 5 Questions Shaping the Trajectory of Your Life. I highly recommend that you listen to the full talk here. The five questions that Jason shares are:
What can I do to stop the pain?
What can I do to feel good now?
What do I want?
What am I capable of?
What are we capable of?
What Got You Here Might Not Get You There
As we move through life, we develop ways of being, beliefs, and behaviors that serve us in the particular stage we’re in. As toddlers, we might learn that throwing a tantrum gets us what we want. In elementary school, we discover that what worked while we were toddlers is no longer effective in our new environment. And so we adapt and grow into new ways of flourishing. Or at least we hope that’s what happens.
An Extravagant Gift
When a pebble is cast into a pond, it creates ripples that spread through the whole body of water. Similarly, we affect the people around us, and our impact ripples through society. We are made to love and to be loved
The Problem with Using Fear as Fuel
The common phrase, “I didn’t feel like doing X,” is a testament to how powerfully emotions influence our behavior. If we don’t feel like doing something, often we don’t follow through. And vice versa. When we feel like doing something, it is much easier to finish a task.
Gathering Data for Judgements About Yourself
We like to think that we use our imagination, but often our imagination uses us. We tend to view ourselves as objective observers of reality. We believe that we gather evidence and make reasonable conclusions. What we tend to ignore is that very often the reverse is true.
Small Things As Leading Indicators
In exercise physiology, pain is considered to be a possible leading indicator of poor mechanics. If you are on a run, for example, and you notice a slight pain in your knee, this can mean that you are not moving with proper form. Leading indicators signal a call to action before things become catastrophic failures.
Why I Never Do My Best
I want to tell on myself: I never do my best. My theory is that you don’t do your best either. Before you proceed, I invite you to notice what thoughts are coming up for you as you process the two sentences above. It might even benefit you to write these thoughts down. OK. Ready? Here’s why I never do my best.
Vision vs. fantasy
“Dreaming or fantasy conceals from us what resources are available, but vision reveals provision.” What’s the difference between fantasies about the future vs. a vision for the future?
Pre-crastination
The word “procrastinate” comes from two Latin words: pro meaning “in favor of” and crastinus meaning “pertaining to tomorrow.” Someone who procrastinates favors putting something off to tomorrow. Often, this comes with an excuse. “I’ll exercise tomorrow. I’m too tired.”
Give Your Word Like a Mountaineer
How well do you steward your word? Do you launch it out there like a cannon ball, and hope that you keep it; or do you give your word like a mountaineer, with foresight and care?
The Problem with Solutions
Most people spend their lives solving one problem after another. As soon as a problem is solved, a new one pops up. In high school, your problem might be getting into a good college. In college, your problem becomes getting a good job. After getting a good job, you want to get married. Once you’re married and have kids, you have to buy a house. Once you have a house, you focus on retiring. And so on and so forth until the day you die.
Tolerating Tepid Water
I turned the unfamiliar dial all the way to the left and the water was still lukewarm. “I guess that will be good enough,” I said to myself. I was away from home. I wasn’t sure what to expect regarding water temperature. Midway through the shower, I started to get cold. I gave the shower dial one more try. I turned the dial harder and lo and behold, it moved! The water was no longer tepid, and I was able to take a nice hot shower.
Trapped in the Toolbox
We live in a world flooded with information about how to do practically everything. Pick your project: losing weight, gaining muscle, cutting debt, getting rich, minimizing distraction, increasing productivity, etc. Whatever your goal may be, there’s an infinite number of useful tools to help you get there. And this leads to a peculiar problem—it is easy to become trapped in the toolbox. Rather than getting dirty and using the tools, you can easily spend your time researching, thinking, and getting ready to do the work.
Beat the Next Boss
In many video games, there is often a more challenging enemy, called a boss, at the end of each level. To get to the next level you have to beat the boss. When you’ve defeated the boss at each level, you beat the game. You rescue the princess, save the world, etc. The path to victory is clear. You just have to beat every boss and work your way through all the levels.
Unconscious Competence as a Superpower
What’s something you know so well that you don’t have to think about it? Tying your shoes, brushing your teeth, or throwing a ball might be examples of actions you are able to accomplish with virtually no reflection. If I asked you, “What’s eight times eight?” you might automatically respond “64.” If that’s the case, you know this fact so well that you can access it effortlessly. Reading these words and understanding them is another example of this sort of reflexive knowledge.
The Perfect Teacher for You
In her book, I Need Your Love — Is That True? Byron Katie says, “There is no mistake about the person you're with; he or she is the perfect teacher for you, whether or not the relationship works out, and once you enter inquiry, you come to see that clearly. There's never a mistake in the universe.”
Your Inner Little Prince
You’re meant to be a king—but instead there’s an unruly little prince running your life. This is what Jen Sincero argues in her book, You Are a Badass at Making Money. She explains how most of us fail to live the greatness we’re called to because we are held back by a collection of limiting beliefs absorbed during childhood. This is what she calls the “little prince.”
Avoiding the Unknown
Creating pocket holes is rather easy. This is what I discovered when I took the time to set up my jig last weekend. Before that, it sat on a shelf for months. I avoided getting started on building some drawers because learning how to use the jig occurred to me as a difficult step. It wasn’t hard in itself, but since it was unknown, there were countless times that I chose to work on another project instead. Once I took the time to actually learn how to use the jig, I was tickled by how long I had avoided it.