What’s Behind What You Seek?

Jesus asked his disciples, “What do you seek?” This is also the question that Matt and Erin Ingold from Metanoia Catholic Coaching use when they begin work with their clients. Recently, I’ve been listening to their podcast and I’ve very much enjoyed the way in which Matt and Erin have integrated Catholic thought with coaching. 

For example, they explain how many clients interpret the question, “What do you seek?,” as “What should I seek?” They give answers like “holiness” or “sanctity,” when in reality this isn’t yet the desire that is currently at the forefront of their heart. Matt and Erin have noticed that many of their clients “dream muscles have atrophied.” 

They argue that it is important to be in touch with our desires because honestly acknowledging what we seek is a first step to an open and authentic relationship with Our Lord in prayer. If we bring our desires to Him, even ones that we consider shameful, then he can begin to transfigure our desires according to His will. Furthermore, when we step out in faith to work toward what we seek, we often find that we are challenged in ways that lead us to grow. 

Another useful question that Matt and Erin ask is, “What is behind what you seek?” All too often, we are so focused on chasing certain outcomes that we forget our deeper purpose. An anecdote from a book called, The Prosperous Coach, serves as a great example of why it is important to ask this question. 

In that book, a client shares with his coach that he’d like to earn a higher salary. When the coach asks him why he would like to earn a higher salary, the client says that it is so that he can spend more time with his wife and kids. At this point, the coach in the book invites the client to explore how he can get to work right now creating a life in which he spends more time with his family while also looking for ways to earn more money. The client was viewing a higher salary as a necessary step in order to spend more time with his family. The coach helped him to see that he could begin working toward his deeper desire right away. 

This week, I invite you to take ask yourself the following questions: 

What do I seek? Are the initial answers I give my honest desires or are they responses to the question, “What should I seek?” Behind each honest desire, what is the deeper purpose? That is, what’s behind what I seek? What can I do right now to bring me closer to attaining my deepest desires? 

God Bless,

Dan